Saturday 20 June 2009

I Can't STRESS it Enough!

Phew....!

What a few weeks Boo's had of it! I've never thought of myself as someone who gets stressed easily... although I admit I do worry if I'm not worrying about something or other. But when it comes to real heavy stress I've recently really had my fill of it.

Stress is a killer. It's all consuming. It's like a beast that feeds on itself- a downward never ending spiral. I've been having sleepless nights, I'm fraught and over emotional, paranoid, my nails are bitten down to the quick, I'm listless and just wanna wrap myself up in my quilt and hideaway.

I keep reminding myself of my friend who I know through work, he suffered so badly with stress that he went off sick, his body went into crisis through diabetes and he ended up having his leg amputated. The last time I saw him he pleaded with me to not ever allow work to stress me out- because it is no way worth it.

Rationally ofcourse it all seems so futile and stupid to be feeling so distressed about something as meaningless as work. I tell myself constantly to stop stressing- it's only a job. I know I have to let go, give up the control I'm so used to and let the powers that be do whatever it is they want to do. It's a painful process but it's time for me to move on and do something else.

I've given myself a target of three months to find another job. That way I've got a light at the end of the tunnel and can pull back. I'm going to do as little as possible at work and enjoy the summer with the lovely QR and Gertie. QR has been my rock and has provided me with sage advice which hasn't always been easy to hear but has always been bang on.

Life really is too short. I need to focus on what is good in my life and stop wasting my energy on futile battles. Boo...pull yourself together!!

Stress.... please don't let the beast get to you!